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Types of Doms

Soft Dom BDSM.

We doubt there are still people that don’t know what BDSM is (you know, Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism). So we’ll skip the parts where we explain what BDSM is and jump straight into the types of dom. Yeah, that’s right. Dominants can also be called Dom and they are the ones that take the external control in the BDSM relationship. Doms tease, flog, spank, lock up, or cage the other partner - referred to as sub/submissive. Also, erase your mind from thinking that only a man can be a dom, there are also female doms (called femdoms or dommes) and they too can be fierce and strict within the play scene. So, what are the different types of dominants?

6 Types of dominants

Before you dive into the different types of dominants, note that they use different types of bondage sex toys. Not only does their choice of BDSM sex toy define a different kind of dominants they are, but they also enhance the play and the pleasure to be derived after. Below are the 6 primary types of dominants you can find within the BDSM community:

  1. The Gentle Dom/Me: These types of dominants are also called soft dom/me. They are generally gentle, calm, and feel more like a protector than a boss/master. When you are with a soft dom, BDSM sex is more sensual and romantic with pleasing touches and a lot of wet openings. During punishments also, they’ll prefer to overstimulate you, tease you, keep you quiet while they leave you to squeeze the bed or scratch the floor, and so on. They are super sweet and gosh, moments with them are always intense. Their favorite types of bondage toys are more focused on pleasure than pain.
  2. The Classic Dom/Me: With these types of dominants, BDSM is typical — not boring. Let’s explain better. Classic fendoms and doms are experienced and knowledgeable about all the rules guiding BDSM and they expect nothing less than perfection during BDSM play. So, when it comes to punishment or training, they are more professional than romantic. With these types of femdoms or dominants, you’ll know what to expect with no dallying around. Their favorite types of bondage toys are the basic things you find in a play scene - ropes, cuffs, machines, sex furniture, and so on.
  3. The Master/Mistress: When there is a master, there is a slave. These BDSM dom types want nothing less than 100% control and power in the relationship. To a master or a mistress, BDSM is a way of life - they love, crave, want, and expect submission from their partner. So BDSM is not just a sexual play to them, it takes over all parts of their affairs. To make it work with these types of BDSM dom/me, you need a whole lot of communication, understanding, and middle ground.
  4. The Sadistic Dom/Me: Without having to explain too deeply, you can already guess what you’ll meet with a sadistic dom or femdom. These types of doms love to play humiliation games where the goal is not to please their BDSM subs but to humiliate when they are naughty. They also love to spank and flog (and other impact plays) as long as they are inflicting pain. This is how they get off. Their favorite types of bondage toys are whips, floggers, spanking paddles, ropes, cages, and so on. Note that there is a difference between sadistic BDSM doms and those that beat their partners. Whatever happens in the play scene has to be discussed first with an inclusion of a safe word.
  5. The Primal Dom/Me: With these types of dominants, BDSM turns into a fight between the prey and the hunter. Having the subs fight back is a dangerous turn-on for these types of doms because they love to have control over when, where, and how to take what they want. When you are with this type of dom, you’ll find yourself begging a lot for what you want as a punishment. So that when you finally get it, the intensity of orgasm becomes a rush until you explode in pleasure.
  6. The Daddy/Mommy Dom/Me: Ever heard of these types of doms? They are very common in the BDSM community. Just as a dad is to his kids or a mum to her children, there are more protective and nurturing than a master or a classic dom/me. A daddy or mummy dom is not about the sexual part alone, they also focus (if not primarily) on the care and love for their subs. They treat all BDSM submissive types as children that they should care for teach, nurture, protect, and love.

There are also some minor types of dominants that are not classified here. Some of them are:

  1. Top: A name was given to the dominant that loves to stay on top, take full control, and plays the role of a master or mistress
  2. Owner: He or she is turned on by pet subs — when a submissive dresses like a pet.
  3. Trainer: A trainer uses whips more often than not as if training a horse.
  4. Role players: These types of dominants love to play in different storylines like employer and employee, boss and receptionist, homeowner and chef, guest and hotel attendant, and so on.


So, among these different types of doms, which of them is your favorite? Which of them seem to have tickled your fancy while reading? Learn more about BDSM and other sexual topics with us and if you are interested in spreading out your sex life, take a look at our best sex toy reviews. We have something that will suit your need and budget.

What is a primal dom?
A primal dom is a person that turns BDSM play into a fight between the prey and the hunter. They love to have their subs fight back because they want control over when, where, and how they get pleasured.
What type of Dom are you?
To figure out what of dom you are, first determine what turns you on the most. Then list out your priorities during sex. If you want to give more love than take, then you are most likely a daddy/mommy or gentle/soft dom.
How to become a professional Dom?
The best way to become a professional dom in the BDSM community is to determine the kind of dom you are. Then make research about what your kind of dom does. Get sex toys to match your type of dom and find a partner to practice with. But remember that consent is key.

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